Deep Thoughts #326b

And then the idiot gerbils can’t manage to tag the correct place when they jump on social media to complain to their fellow mental furballs.

Deep Thoughts #326a

By standing up to a couple of lying MAGA jackoffs, the Chatterbox staff demonstrated the kind of integrity that traitorous Republicans lack.

Deep Thoughts #325

Spot the example of yet another Trumpy jackoff and its xenophobia in this article. The author correctly makes it sound like the idiot it is.

Deep Thoughts #324

It just occurred to me that someone needs to figure the over/under for when ICE officially turns into the American version of the Nazi’s SS.

Deep Thoughts #323

Here is yet another sign that these talking MAGA abortions are uninformed, uneducated jackoffs. I am, once again, totally fucking surprised.

613. Kismetic Beer Company (Indianapolis, IN) - Watermelon Mint Gose

“Our take on a gose-style kettle sour, with additions of pink sea salt, and both cold and hot steepings of Nelson’s Tea Watermelon Mint rooibos blend. Notes of mint and tropical fruit on the nose, sour and herbal, salty and refreshing.”

Moderate flavor of herbal mint up front, with just a hint of watermelon, and a light sour taste. As the beer warms, the watermelon flavor becomes a little more pronounced and the mint gets a bit lighter. Sours are definitely one of Ryan’s strong suits, and this one might well be the best of the lot.

Deep Thoughts #322e

Of course, if it turns out that all Republicans are Nazis, I won’t be surprised; those fucks have been Nazis since Barack Obama was elected.

Deep Thoughts #322d

I don’t think all Republicans are Nazis. I imagine most of them were raised badly by bad parents who were too fucking stupid to know better.

Deep Thoughts #322c

President Musk is playing Donald Trump like a two-dollar banjo, and the stupid tangerine monkey can’t understand what the fuck is happening.

Deep Thoughts #322b

(For the simpletons out there—meaning most of the Republicans of course—that does mean that I think Musk is a Nazi and Trump is its puppet.)

Deep Thoughts #322a

Have the oddsmakers out there set the over/under on when President Musk is going to order his Orange Lackey to send troops to invade Poland?

Short's Brewing Company - Holiday Battle Plan

Amy and I went to Bloomington for a three-day weekend recently, and on our way back to the hotel after we went shopping on the west side, we stopped at the big Big Red (if you went to IU, you know what I mean) for drinks for the room, and I came across a 12-pack from Short’s with this Home Alone theme. The four beers inside are named after scenes or lines from the film, and they are all in the good-but-not-great range; but getting the descriptions from the website was a lot of fun, and I genuinely can’t remember if I have ever enjoyed the non-beer aspects of a 12-pack of beer quite this much. I love the film, and I’m sure that’s part of it; but whoever came up with this idea was all in, and I think that’s pretty fucking cool.

608. Short’s Brewing Company (Elk Rapids, MI) - Oh Kay
“Just your average, hazy, piney, ctirusy, fruity, IPA here. Nothing to see. Just driving around in our blue, beat up, panel van, ready to tackle your plumbing and heating needs. Definitely not cat burglars about to rob your house or anything. Don’t worry, you’re in good hands.”

This is just a few ABV points shy of being spectacular. There’s a respectable balance between West Coast pine and citrus and East Coast stone fruit, but it leans just a bit toward the smoother, sweeter East Coast style and feels like it should clock in somewhere between 6% and 7% rather than the 5.8% where it actually lands.

609. Short’s Brewing Company (Elk Rapids, MI) - Thirsty for More
“You’ve finally got yourself into the house. You’ve kicked your shoes off (or lost them thanks to some tar on the basement steps), set your hat down (or had it burned off by a blow torch), and you’re ready for a tall, cold glass of dry hopped lager, a noseful of citrus and melon with a slightly bready malt aftertaste. Its [sic] almost like someone thwacked you in the head with a paint can of delight. Definitely not giving up. Definitely Thirsty for More.”

Also well balanced, though I was unfamiliar with the New Zealand style of lager until I looked it up. Turns out it’s basically the same as India Pale Lager, like Black Acre’s Natural Liberty; and that means—lagers with flavor. In this case, that would be light fruit flavors and a surprisingly dry finish. At only 5.1%, it’s practically sessionable. Not as nearly great as Oh Kay, but pretty good.

611. Short’s Brewing Company (Elk Rapids, MI) - Junk and Rubbish
“You’ve made your family disappear, time to pop in Angels with Filthy Souls, throw on a napkin bib, and pour yourself a ginormous mug of Junk and Rubbish, our cool, cool cocoa and marshmallow stout. Cocoa, vanilla and marshmallow are paired with sweet, toasted maltiness for a rich, creamy, full mouthfeel—reminiscent of hot cocoas and overflowing sundaes. Topping it with excessive amounts of marshmallows, candy, chocolate syrup is also, um, a choice you could make? (Crunch Gators are the preferred side, BTW.)”

Robust chocolate flavor up front, which works well with the 7.5% ABV. (The can refers to it as a double chocolate stout.) I don’t taste marshmallow or vanilla, but I suspect they are there, because there is a smoothness to the chocolate flavor that almost has to come from the addition of something sweeter. It’s oddly playful, and I think the best of the four beers in this package.

612. Short’s Brewing Company (Elk Rapids, MI) - Silver Tuna
“Of all the beers in the pack, this one is is [sic] THE ONE, Marv. It’s very ‘G.’ It’s got lots of top flight goods. Orange, tart cranberry, subtle hints of mulling spices. A little sour? You bet. Who knows. Its [sic] a gem. Hand me a crowbar. Crowbars up!”

Moderately sour up front, with the orange and cranberry flavors coming together in the middle and then fading into a lingering hint of spice on the back end. Very well done.

610. Moontown Brewing Company (Whitestown, IN) - Tippecanoe River

“Time to celebrate our beautiful state during the changing seasons with our next exploration in our Pints for Parks series! Our 12th journey in our series takes us just a bit north to Winamac to Tippecanoe River State Park. It’s always a great time to get outside, but especially this time of year with the changing of the leaves and when you can have a delicious West Coast IPA as your trail partner. Built with our steadfast Sugar Creek Malt Co pilsner malt, creating a lovely clean malt profile, balanced out on the hot side by Simcoe, and loaded with Citra, Strata, and Nectaron hops throughout whirlpool and the two rounds of dry hopping. The trip down this river is incredibly fragrant boasting intense tropical fruits and citrus blended with some dank. This ride is smooth and clean with a nice bitterness, finishing crisp. Get your paddle and let’s go have some fun. Thank you for continuing to support our state parks, cheers to the great outdoors!”

Sharp and bitter up front, with pine and stone fruit and a nice clean finish when it’s good and cold. Definitely a West Coast IPA, but with just a hint of East Coast in there, too. I’m sort of up and down on their other beers, but their Pints for Parks beers (much like the Craft Brew Doodle Crew IPAs from the late, lamented Indiana City) are spectacular.

607. Kismetic Beer Company (Indianapolis, IN) - Orange Plum Sour with Lavender

“A new take on our sour. Brewed with Montana pilsner, white wheat and flaked wheat. Steeped with a blend of lavender and orange peel, fruited with plum. Lightly herbal on the nose, with notes of citrus and stone fruit. Bright sourness balanced on the palate with rich plum and sweet clementines.”

I’m getting a strong floral aroma on the nose, with light orange and stone fruit flavor up front. The stone fruit lingers on the back end quite pleasantly, and there is just the barest hint of sour. Ryan has a real knack for brewing sours that are sour without also being a kick in the nuts. He is easily the most gifted brewer I have encountered since I discovered Dan Gayle’s beers at Black Circle. Nothing Ryan brews is disappointing, even styles I don’t usually dig very much. I really can’t say enough about this place, nor about Nicole and Ryan. (Go on a weekend sometime, when one of them is pulling handles behind the bar. Listen to them talk. That’s what the proprietor of your local watering hole is supposed to sound like.)

Deep Thoughts #321

You fucked this country and you should be convicted of treason, hanged from a tree, and your children should have to watch you die, inbreed.

Deep Thoughts #320

Republicans should be gang-raped in the asshole in front of their children by huge rabid dogs and then be burned at the stake fucking twice.

Deep Thoughts #319

You are learning impaired and your parents should have aborted you. Go back to school, and then die. Never reproduce. Inbred fucking monkey.

Deep Thoughts #318

Every monkey who voted for lying rapist Donald Trump is a living abortion who should die in a fire in front of their inbred donkey children.

606. Cervecería Centro Americano, S.A. (Guatemala City, Guatemala) - Gallo

“A beer of incomparable quality and flavor, the pride of Guatemalans. Its flavor is accentuated and defined by a special bitterness from the hops, with an alcohol content of 5%. It has a dark golden hue and its foam is clear and stable.”

I first tried this beer 10 years ago, when we went to Guatemala on a mission trip. We had the first evening to ourselves, so two of us, another dude named John, and I, got a tuktuk into town—everybody else was too tired to hit the bricks. We had no real idea what we were doing or where we were going—which is probably why we ended up asking for directions in a brothel—but eventually we made it to Calle Santander and found a place where we could get a beer (and listen to a gringo called Matteo, who played chords on a guitar badly, apparently in exchange for some hot soup). The beer was Gallo, which appears to have been rechristened Famosa at some point on its voyage to the States; but it will always be Gallo to me. It can now be had here, but at $20 for a 12-pack, it’s too pricey—except to have an experimental go at it or to relive memories of looking at three volcanoes across one of the most beautiful lakes in the world, which I have had the good fortune to do—twice.

It’s billed as a lager, and that’s what it tastes like; but it’s deeper and richer than most American lagers, though “dark golden hue” is stretching it. I don’t recall what the ones called Gallo tasted like when I was in Guatemala, but the ones I’m tasting out of cans here at home make me wonder if something has changed in the translation. It ain’t worth $20, but it’s hella better than most of the macrobrewed shit they orchestrate out of the low countries.