Wednesday, June 21, 2017

3. New Belgium - Citradelic Exotic Lime Ale

“A crisp, refreshing golden ale bursting with juicy Persian lime, freshly ground coriander and a hint of cracked black pepper.”

Aren’t we ambitious? I’m not too proud to say that the hint of cracked black pepper escaped me, but I did taste the lime and the coriander. “Crisp” in this case tasted more to me like “dry to the point of being bitter,” though not necessarily in an off-putting way. This one just didn’t work for me. (If I had two or three on a hot day while mowing the grass, that might be another story.)

Saturday, June 10, 2017

2. Three Floyds - Zombie Dust Pale Ale

“This intensely hopped and gushing undead pale ale will be one’s only respite after the zombie apocalypse. Created with our marvelous friends in the comic industry.”

I’ve never been bowled over by 3 Floyds, but as a collector I appreciate scarcity—so I was always going to covet Zombie Dust until I had the chance to try some. The “intensely hopped” part is entirely accurate, but it’s Citra hop, so there is less bitterness and the illusion of balance. That’s not balance, though; it’s the moderate alcohol (6.2%) kicking your ass. Entirely enjoyable, but I’m sorry 3 Floyds, I’m just not that into you. It’s me, not you. Okay? Can we still be friends?

1. Urban Artifact - Phrenology Wild Style IPA (Batch #5 March 2017)

“An IPA with the wild yeast Brettanomyces can be drank young or old.”

And then below the tagline is a timeline indicating that the beer will be hoppier right after it was brewed in March, becoming funkier as it gets older. March, of course, was three months ago, and there is, indeed, some of that funk beginning to develop. The foamy head lingers after the pour, and the first taste is all Brett, with a dry, hoppy finish. Oddly drinkable for a dry, high alcohol (7.3%) IPA.

Beer Run

So a few of us from the old juke joint went out to Big Lug Canteen a few weeks ago for the third stop on our local brewery tour, and we were joined by the lovely and beguiling Shane White, who has a whole blog devoted to his quest to quaff one thousand different malted grain and hops concoctions. We discussed the pros and cons of pouring into a mug versus drinking from the container, whether said mugs should be frosted or not, and the quality of the brews they’re tapping at Black Circle. Alas, Shane and I did not agree on much—except that Black Acre’s Cherry Ol’ Fritz is freaking awesome—but that’s okay, because lively debate is good for the soul. Plus, sharing one’s experiences with the metastasizing phenomenon that is craft beer can, I think, lead to only one thing—discovering and enjoying more fine craft beer.

Naturally, I decided to steal Shane’s idea, but with a couple of differences. (Those of you who remember Vanilla Ice explaining how the bass line in “Ice Ice Baby” differed from the bass line in “Under Pressure” because of a single one-eighth note will likely see where I am coming from with this argument.) I’m not shooting for a thousand, and I’m not making a whole new blog. See how different it is? So yeah, I’m stealing Shane’s idea. And I’m going to post pictures of beer I poured into frosted mugs.

Deep Thoughts #146

Does anyone happen to know the odds of randomly stumbling across a reference to the musical group Limbomaniacs while browsing the interwebs?

Thursday, June 08, 2017

Deep Thoughts #145

So according to Paul Ryan, if you’re ignorant and unqualified, it’s okay to commit a federal crime. What the fuck is wrong with Republicans?

Wednesday, June 07, 2017

Deep Thoughts #144

How long will it be before Mike Pence starts to feel like one of the musicians on the Titanic who kept right on playing while the ship sank?

Monday, June 05, 2017

There Are 10 Kinds of People in the World: Those Who Understand Binary, and Those Who Do Not

Jackson is ten years old today. That's really all I have. I don't have the strength for anything else.


Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Deep Thoughts #143

Supporting Herr Trump is enough reason to bash someone, but the carnival scrambler that is Scott Baio keeps talking and giving us even more!

Deep Thoughts #142

Someone should conduct a study so that we can prove empirically that Scott Baio’s brain was more addled than Erin Moran’s this past weekend.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Deep Thoughts #141

Republicans do not believe in government, yet ask you to vote for them to work in…government. Can these monkeys please fucking die, already?

Deep Thoughts #140

I got to thinking this one should be more meta than deep; but since this is all there is to it, maybe neither of those qualifiers qualifies.

Deep Thoughts #139

To Mike Pence: Take your pretentious “Christian first” shit and go back to Columbus where you fucking belong, you cocaine-haired misogynist.

Saturday, February 25, 2017

And Even Another Way is, He Was Thrown Out of a Window, by Marsellus, Because of You.

I don't regret supporting Hillary Clinton in the 2016 election. Like most folks, I never really believed that a half-melted Cabbage Patch doll* could win the presidency; but I also had a hard time believing that a real liberal like Bernie Sanders could drive more than his wing of the Democratic party to the polls. I don't think the lesson of hindsight is that Bernie should have gotten the nomination; I think the lesson of hindsight is that we should have recognized the danger of Trump's insurgency and done more to shore up support for Clinton in the Rust Belt states that turned the election for the Nazi dumpster fire - Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan, and Wisconsin.

Still...every now and then...I guess you can't help but wonder...

"I"ll never hold what could've been...on a cold...and lone-LEE NIGHT!"

(You know you belted the part from the end of the song. So did I.)

Whence this bizarre outpouring of affection for Senator Bernie Sanders? Heather included a link to the following tweet of his in a comment to one of my previous posts:

*—I love you, Sadie Stein!

Tuesday, January 31, 2017

More Inauguration Photos of the National Mall

One is from Reuters, and I don't remember where I got the other one. It was on a flash drive I use for collecting evidence against the evil empire at the old juke joint. If I've breached someone's copyright, go fuck yourself. (If you're a Republican and you voted for the Nazi in the Oval Office. If you are otherwise, just give me a shout out, and I'll fix it.) Posting as many pictures as I can find of the difference in crowd size at the two inaugurations isn't going to accomplish anything; I am well aware of that.

Uncredited, due to journalistic ineptitude of blog author.


But I don't know if I am going to survive the next four years. I haven't been able to think of how to affect this disaster in a positive way. I wrote in a previous post about how I was on the fence as to whether apoplectic rage or constructive criticism was the appropriate response to a Cheeto-hued despot (which description I first saw on the unofficial Twitter account for Badlands National Park, but which has since been removed), and I am leaning toward constructive criticism - though I don't believe either one is going to have much impact. If a Senate committee can endorse the nomination of Betsy DeVos, possibly the most ridiculous upright speech-capable organism with opposable thumbs ever to be nominated for a Cabinet-level position, then I mean what the fucking fuck?

Grizzlies? Really?

Saturday, January 28, 2017

Illegitimate President Donald J. Trump is a Fucking Liar

There were more people on the National Mall to watch the inauguration in 2009 than there were in 2017. People who claim otherwise, including the illegitimate Nazi currently occupying the White House in direct contravention of the will of the people of the United States, as well as the mental furball he appointed as Press Secretary, are liars. Even Fox News posted a story confirming that Trump had lied. (They didn't say he lied, or call him a liar, or post the widely-shared comparison photo - but they're spineless weasels who think Sean Hannity is a good idea. What can you do?)

The New York Times, a real journalism operation, actually posted two shots of each inauguration, as well as an illustration of the areas on the mall with the highest concentrations of people. They hedge just a touch by noting that it was cloudy for the inauguration of the dumpster fire, a condition that would impede a more empirical illustration of the difference in crowd size.

But give that one a second. It was sunny for the inauguration of Barack Obama and cloudy for the inauguration of his illegitimate and unwanted successor. Even the weather knows this fucking turd is a bad idea.

What follows are some of the versions of this photo that I have so far collected.

The Guardian

New York Times

The original National Parks Service tweet that made the unwanted President want to cry.